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It hung loosely down the wall as I cried and cried. Who was this masked man? How could I not notice that he was not Ken? There were things that signaled it was not Ken. I disregarded the differences. I allowed myself to be seduced. I went willingly. I cried. I felt dirty and alone. Late in the afternoon Jan found me still sitting on the floor. Between tears I confessed that I cheated on my loving husband. I told her the whole sad tale. When Jan said I was raped, I shook my head as I went willingly. I wanted him and offered myself to him. Is this a divine revenge for what I have done? Jan disagreed. But I was inconsolable. Jan made a telephone call. I could not hear all that she was saying. A half-hour later, Ruth arrived to spend the night with me Ruth silently held me as I wept. There is no way I can go anywhere this morning. I do not know how I am going to deal with this. I do not know what I am going to say to Ken. I feel so ashamed and dirty. I played the roll of a slut and I. An opportunity like that doesn't fall in your lap everyday."Elvira and I talked about it for a long time and ... well, in the end we thought that me spending a year in Canada whilst she finished her Masters in Salford wouldn't be much of a problem. As it turned out, it was. Everything went sour on us -- we sort-of drifted apart while I was away."When I came got back into the UK, Elvira seemed to be to a different person. Everything had changed somehow. We just weren't anything like as close as we had been. And I sensed something was definitely different the first time we made love together as well." Oh dear, that happened to my cousin when he was stationed abroad with the army. His marriage didn't survive." Jean commented."Yeah well, I don't know, I suppose I should have known something weren't right, while I was still over there. When Elvira and I spoke on the telephone, for the first month or so she sounded fine, all lovey-dovey like she had been before I went. But as the months.
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